A Couple Counselors

It’s one thing I’ve learned about this job: You have to be ready for anything.

Emergencies happen. Fights break out. Kids take off running. Situations escalate, and in those moments, you don’t have time to get ready; you have to be ready.

Mentally and physically. I wasn’t always.

I’ve dealt with injuries for years, and I’ve been overweight for most of my life. Then COVID hit, and like a lot of people, I put on even more weight. At some point, I had to be honest with myself not just about how I looked, but about how I was showing up.

I didn’t just want to feel better. I wanted to be mobile, present, and able to move when something actually happened in my building.

And if I’m being honest, I also wanted to upgrade my roast game. It’s a lot harder for kids to come at you when they have less visible things to notice.

So I made a shift. Not extreme. Not overnight. Just consistent.

I started eating better, moving more, and building routines that actually fit my day. Cafeteria duty became the time to get my steps in. 

Why Physical Health Actually Matters in This Job

People talk about mental health in counseling. We should. But what about physical health? That’s part of it, too, because this job will drain you.

You’re constantly holding space for other people, managing crises, and staying emotionally regulated for kids who aren’t.

And what a lot of people don’t realize is that if your body is drained, your mind follows behind it.

Movement isn’t just about fitness. It’s about showing up the way this job demands.

And in a job where you’re carrying other people’s emotions all day? That matters, too.

How I Built Movement Into My Day (Without Adding More Time)

What I didn’t realize at first is that there’s actually a name for what I started doing. It’s called habit stacking—a concept from behavioral science developed by BJ Fogg.

The idea is simple:

Instead of trying to create new time in your day, you attach a new habit to something you’re already doing.

When I heard that, it clicked for me. So that’s exactly what I started to do. It wasn’t about being disciplined; it was about just being strategic.

I didn’t create a new workout plan or carve out extra time. I just took things I was already doing in my day and made them work for me instead of against me. This even saved me time at the gym after work. 

I didn’t build a new routine. I used the one I already had.

How Cafeteria Duty Became My Step Count

I turned cafeteria duty into movement. I’m walking the aisles, checking in on kids, building rapport, and at the same time, I’m getting my steps in.

The kids think I’m just doing my job, but I’m really taking care of my health while I’m doing it.

Now, yeah, my wife will tell you cafeteria duty isn’t the best use of a counselor’s time. She’s not wrong. But I made it work for me because I’m not sitting all day anymore.

I turned cafeteria duty into movement. I’m walking the aisles, checking in on kids, building rapport, and at the same time, I’m getting my steps in.

The kids think I’m just doing my job, but I’m really taking care of my health while I’m doing it.

Now, yeah, my wife will tell you cafeteria duty isn’t the best use of a counselor’s time. She’s not wrong. But I made it work for me because I’m not sitting all day anymore.

• Standing Desk = Staying Visible and Productive: I got a rolling standing desk jawn in my office. That thing is the MVP. It keeps me moving, visible, and engaged. I’m not stuck behind a desk. I’m part of the environment.
• Calming Corner = Movement for Me Too: I have bean bags and a rug set up for students. Sometimes, if I’m eating in my room or have a hard session, I’ll go over there and stretch for a couple of minutes. Not long, just enough to reset.
• Movement Built Into Conversations: Sometimes I’ll take laps through the building while talking with students. I don’t always need to have a private sit-down session. Some kids open up more when they’re moving anyway. And at the same time, I’m taking care of myself too.

Why Habit Stacking Works

The reason habit stacking works is that it removes the need for motivation. You’re not asking yourself to do more. You’re just doing something differently inside what already exists.

That’s why it sticks. That’s why it lasts. I didn’t add movement to my day. I just attached it to what I was already doing.

Set Your Own Health Goals

This part matters because a lot of people hear “get healthy” and think the gym every day, running miles, and strict diets. That’s not always realistic for everybody. And it’s definitely not always necessary.

Your version of a health goal might be walking more during the day, yoga, changing your eating habits, or taking movement breaks between sessions.

I’ve got a coworker in his 40s challenging kids to push-up contests—and beating them. That’s his thing. Your thing might look different.

Important Note

If you’ve got injuries, health conditions, or haven’t been active in a while: Don’t go from 0 to 100.

Talk to a doctor or a physical therapist. Start where you are. The goal isn’t intensity. It’s consistency.

What Students Learn Without You Teaching It

This is the part people overlook. Kids are always watching. Not just what you say, but what you do.

When they see you moving, taking care of yourself, and showing up with energy, they notice. They might not say anything, but it sticks. Some of them will start to move differently, too. When I eat a salad in the cafeteria or in the hall, some of them make comments, and I always say the same thing, “I eat this because my health matters! When you get my age, you should be eating these things too.” Others ask questions about why I always eat healthy foods. That opens the door for conversations and dialogue about the importance of eating anything other than purple colored hot chips.

The Reality of This Job

This job is demanding. You’re constantly giving to everyone, students, staff, families, and it’s easy to lose yourself in that. It’s easy to sit all day. It’s easy to say, “I’ll get to it later.” But later doesn’t always come.

Taking care of your physical health isn’t extra. It’s part of staying in the work.  Not just for your students. Not just for your school, but for you.

So whether it’s walking the halls, standing while you work, stretching in your room, or turning cafeteria duty into cardio, find something that works for your day. Stick with it and build from there.

It’s about being consistent enough to stay present, stay mobile, and stay in the work long-term. Because self-care isn’t selfish; it’s how you make sure you’re still here for your students, your family, and yourself.

-Charles